Christian is 5

Five years ago my life changed forever. I had a new baby boy to snuggle and he was the most beautiful thing. Those first few days are a blur, but I know I held you a lot and stared in wonder at the blessing God had sent me and your Daddy. Just today I sat in the church nursery holding a little boy and got all teary eyed thinking of you. There was a CD playing in the room that we used to listen to a lot when you were a baby and it just took me back to the little room in our little white house...those days were sweet and I tried to cherish them all, but even now I sit here wanting to turn back time. To be able to hold you in my arms once more and not have legs down past my knees:) And to take care of your every need...you are becoming so independent and your confidence is growing more everyday...that is such a good thing, but it leaves me realizing you don't need me as much. This fall you will begin going to school EVERYDAY and you will learn sooooo much. You already have such an interest in learning and I want that to continue. You say you'll be an astronaut someday and even though it would take you even further away I want you to try. You can do anything you put that little mind to.

Your sensitive heart is your best and sometimes most frustrating feature of your personality. It can mean some long days when you have that heart on your sleeve, but it also makes me proud when you use it to help others. You are very aware of all things around you and always know when something is different or out of place. Your mind is really starting to work and put things together. Just the other night we were riding in the car and listening to a song called "I saw God Today", you asked how that man saw God and I tried to explain that you can see God in all sorts of things: a beautiful day, time with family/friends, a new baby being born, enjoying something you really like, etc. You processed that for a little while and than came up with this profound statement: (I'll try to quote it word for word) "That's funny...Jesus is God's son and Jesus is God...so they're the same person?!?! Mommy how can He be both? I replied "because He's God and he can do all sorts of great things" and you said " Wow, He sure can!" I can't tell you how much that conversation meant to me...God is working on your heart little man and you are really starting to 'get it'...Mommy, Daddy and so many others have been His tools so far and I know there will be many more, but I love the fact that you are piecing it together for yourself.

Just now you came out of your room and asked what I was doing so I read this to you...I teared up once again while holding you and you asked "Mommy what's that drip?" and I said they were happy tears and you gave the biggest hug and said "it's okay Mommy"

I love you sweet boy and can't wait to see what the next five years have in store for you